How to Write a Thesis Statement

With few exceptions, most papers you will write at Bow Valley College will require some form of an academic argument. To start with an academic argument, you must take a position and have a point to make. The main point of your assignment will be the thesis of your paper. Your thesis is a firm statement or claim regarding your topic. It must be in your introductory paragraph.

Here are Some Guidelines to Keep in Mind While Thinking About a Tentative Thesis:

I) Your thesis should be clear, assertive, concise, and specific.

II) Your thesis should be relevant to the question/topic.

III) Your thesis should be debatable.

IV) You should be able to state your thesis as a complete sentence.

Weak Thesis Examples:

“Drinking and driving is bad.”

This is a true statement that cannot be logically debated.

“Emily Dickinson’s poems about death are some of the most interesting ever written.”

This is a personal opinion, as opposed to a thesis, because the reader only knows that the author likes Emily Dickinson’s poems about death.

Strong Thesis Examples:

“Drunk driving laws need to include stricter penalties for those convicted of driving under the influence of alcohol.”

This is a clear, concise argument that is debatable.

“Because I could not stop for Death” challenges preconceptions that Dickinson’s contemporaries had about death, and in doing so it makes us challenge ours as well.”

This thesis limits the paper’s scope by focusing on a single poem; it makes an assertion to defend (that Dickinson challenged 19th century preconceptions about death), and it shows why this point is significant to the reader (because the reader might have their own preconceptions challenged).

Writing Body Paragraphs Using the PEEL System

Each body paragraph is built around a different idea. While each body paragraph contains a different idea, how a student writes them is formulaic.

When writing a body paragraph, remember the PEEL acronym and you will include everything required to get full marks.

Step1: Point - This is your topic sentence and the main idea of the paragraph. Every sentence that follows in the body paragraph must be related to this idea.

Step 2: Example - Provide an example to support your topic sentence (usually from an assigned text).

Step 3: Explain your analysis - Explain to the reader why the example is important. You are answering the question “So What?”

Note: After an example, it is imperative that the student explains why the example is important. Failure to do so will result in a low mark for that paragraph.

Step 4: Link - Connect the body paragraph to your thesis. This reminds the reader of what your thesis is, and how they are related. Finally, link the body paragraph to the next paragraph with a transition sentence.

Note: While PEEL is effective for an assignment that is 1-2 pages long, the writer may have to apply PEEEEL (Point, Example 1, Explain 1, Example 2, Explain 2, Link) to an assignment that is 3-4 pages long or PEEEEEEL (Point, Example 1, Explain 1, Example 2, Explain 2, Example 3, Explain 3, Link) to an assignment that is 5-10 pages long.

Writing a Conclusion

A conclusion is more than just a simple summary and restatement of your thesis. It is the second most important paragraph in your essay because it is your last chance to convince your reader why your thesis is correct.

Your Conclusion Should:

A) Stress the importance of your thesis statement and provide the reader with a clear understanding of your view on the subject/topic.

B) Demonstrate the implications of your claims or connections between the literature and real life.

C) Answer the question of "So What?“ In other words, why does your thesis matter and why should the reader care?

D) Show the reader how the points you made, and the examples you used, were not random, but fit together.

Using Quotations

Ideas from your essay should primarily be your own. However, using direct quotations is an essential strategy to show that an authority supports your point. Other reasons to include quotations in your work are: to use in your hook sentence (the first sentence in your introductory paragraph); using a quotation can help the reader present a point or argument to critique or comment on; to include powerful or field related language; to present a known passage that would lose its meaning if it was paraphrased or summarized.

To help you determine when and how to use quotations, here are some important tips:

Ensure you are Reproducing the Exact Wording, Spelling, and Punctuation of Every Quotation:

• Even if the word is spelled wrong or a sentence is grammatically incorrect, you MUST type it out as is, because when you place quotation marks around something, you are indicating that you are reproducing the original product.

• If you notice an error of inconsistency, type out the error as is, and follow it up with the word [sic] in square brackets.

E.g., “It was the best of times, it was the blurst [sic] of times.”

Use the Shortest Quotation you can While Making your Point:

• Since the dominant voice of your paper should be yours, DO NOT quote a paragraph when a sentence contains your main point. DO NOT quote a whole sentence when you can integrate a few words into one of your own sentences.

• Short texts should be indicated by using quotation marks at the beginning and end of your quotation.

• For multi-sentence texts, use an indented block-style paragraph form to offset your quotation.

How to Use Punctuation with Quotation Marks:

• Parenthetical citations: With short quotations, place citations outside of the closing quotation marks, followed by sentence punctuation (period, question mark, comma, semi-colon, colon).

E.g., Mackenzie (2020) describes writing in academic English as “really freaking hard” (p. 6).

• Commas and periods: Place inside closing quotation marks when no parenthetical citation follows.

E.g., Mackenzie (2020) notes that “distance education is not new,” but because of Covid19, distance education may become “the new norm” (p. 10).

• Semi-colons and colons: Place outside of closing quotation marks (or after a parenthetical citation).

• Question marks and exclamation points: Place inside closing quotation marks if the quotation is a question/exclamation:

E.g., Menand (2001) acknowledges that H. W. Fowler’s Modern English Usage is “a classic of the language,” but he asks, “Is it a dead classic?” (p. 114).

Note that a period still follows the closing parenthesis.

Place outside of closing quotation marks if the entire sentence containing the quotation is a question or exclamation:

E.g., How many students read the guide to find out what is meant by “academic misconduct”?

• Quotations within quotations. Use single quotation marks for the embedded quotation:

E.g., According to Hertzberg (2002), Dahl gives the U.S. Constitution “bad marks in ‘democratic fairness’ and ‘encouraging consensus’” (p. 90).

The phrases “democratic fairness” and “encouraging consensus” are already in quotation marks in Dahl’s sentence.

• Use ellipsis points (. . .) to indicate an omission within a quotation - but not at the beginning or end, unless it’s not obvious that you’re quoting only a portion of the whole.

Never Assume a Quotation is Self-explanatory:

To get full marks for an assignment, a student must always explain and analyze why the quote they used in their assignment is important. Be as specific as possible. Remember, while the quote may be obvious to you, it may not be as obvious to the reader.

If you are quoting a character in a story, play, film, or poem, be sure to distinguish that character from the author:

• Remember, Hamlet says, “To be or not to be,” NOT Shakespeare, and you MUST make that distinction clear.

Avoid using floating quotations - a sentence that begins with a quote - because it can cause confusion for the reader. The writer must always setup/introduce a quote before using it.

Use a signal phrase to lead into your quotations to allow for a smoother transition between your words and the quotation:

• By introducing the author:

E.g., The author said … Smith mentioned … According to the author/Smith ...

• By introducing the source:

E.g., The most recent research indicates that …

DO NOT Use a Quote out of Context:

E.g., The quote “Great minds think alike” has actually been taken out of context, even though it is now widely accepted that the meaning is: if someone else has the same idea as you, then it must be a good idea. However, the full original quote is: “Great minds think alike, but fools seldom differ.” The meaning behind this quote implies that one should look beyond the obvious and not think in the same way as everyone else. The established meaning now has been distorted and is a misrepresentation of the original meaning.

Finally, reference the source of your quotation BOTH within your writing and in your reference section! Go to About APA Style - APA Style, 7th Edition - LibGuides at Bow Valley College to learn how to properly cite your work.

References

Gardner, J.E., & Diaz, J., (2017). Reading and writing about literature (4th ed). Macmillan Learning.

Purdue Online Writing Lab. (n.d.). Paraphrase: Write in your own words. Paraphrasing - Purdue OWL® - Purdue University 

Spatt, B. (1999). Writing from sources (5th ed.). St. Martin’s Press. University of Wisconsin-Madison. (2020). The writer’s handbook. UW-Madison Writer’s Handbook – The Writing Center – UW–Madison (wisc.edu)

Paraphrasing

If you choose to use an idea from a source that is not a direct quotation (four words or more in a sequence), you will need to paraphrase the text. This might seem like a difficult task, but using a systematic approach can make it simpler.

Try following these steps to break down the process:

Strategy 1:

1. Choose a partial or full sentence(s) to represent your idea and ensure that you fully understand it.

We will use the following single sentence to demonstrate the different steps involved in paraphrasing:

"Many people agree with this concept, which without a doubt, validates Einstein’s brilliant general theory of relativity."

2. Break the sentence up into blocks which represent sub-ideas (highlight or use vertical lines):

Many people agree with this concept, which without a doubt, validates Einstein’s brilliant general theory of relativity.

3. Cross out non-essential ideas/words that are not important and/or repeat an idea:

Many people agree with this concept, which without a doubt, validates Einstein’s brilliant general theory of relativity.

(We could have also omitted the word “brilliant”; however, for our purposes, we will keep it).

4. Underline or circle essential key words (keep these words! DO NOT replace with synonyms).

Examples: Numbers (statistics, dates, etc.) and proper nouns (names of people, places and organizations).

Many people agree with this concept, which without a doubt, which validates Einstein’s brilliant general theory of relativity.

5. Substitute other key words with synonyms that fit within the context of your writing:

Note: It is not necessary to replace all essential key words with synonyms.

A number of people support this idea, which proves Einstein’s ingenious general theory of relativity.

6. Change the grammatical forms of key words (nouns to verbs and vice versa, etc.):

Note: Words can be added to maintain grammatical integrity as long as the meaning behind the text remains essentially unchanged.

A number of people support this idea, which provides proof for Einstein’s ingenious general theory of relativity.

7. Change the verb tense or voice:

A number of people are supporting this idea, which provides proof for Einstein’s ingenious general theory of relativity.

8. Rearrange the order of the ideas:

Note: Connecting words and verb forms can be changed and/or added to preserve correct grammatical structure.

Proof for Einstein’s ingenious general theory of relativity is provided by this idea, which has the support of a number of people.

Here is the final transformation using Strategy 1:

(Original sentence)

"Many people agree with this concept, which without a doubt, validates Einstein’s brilliant general theory of relativity."

(Paraphrased sentence)

"Proof for Einstein’s ingenious general theory of relativity is provided by this idea, which has the support of a number of people."

Remember:

- For multi-sentence texts, ideas can be rearranged between sentences and not just within a sentence.

- You will want to use a combination of these strategies and not only one or two of them, in order to paraphrase properly and avoid plagiarism.

For example, do not just:

Rearrange blocks of words within the original sentence or text:

Without a doubt, this concept, which many people agree with, validates Einstein’s brilliant general theory of relativity.

OR

Simply replace words with synonyms in the original sentence:

A lot of people concur with this idea, which undoubtedly proves Einstein’s general theory of relativity.

(Here, “brilliant” has been omitted; even in using two different strategies, this would be considered to be weak paraphrasing).

Strategy 2:

Ideas can also be presented in alternate or opposite ways, particularly when it comes to paraphrasing statistical data. Use these strategies on the following sentence:

28% of the students forgot to do their homework.

(Remember to first break up the sentence into word blocks and find substitutions for the first block of words.)

1. State numbers in alternate ways:

Approximately 30% of the students forgot to do their homework.

Almost one third of the students forgot to do their homework.

2. Express ideas in opposite ways:

72% of the students remembered to do their homework. OR

Almost three quarters of the students remembered to do their homework. OR

Almost three quarters of the students did not forget to do their homework.

Note: The way in which you decide to paraphrase your idea(s) will depend on what you want to emphasize.

References

Gardner, J.E., & Diaz, J., (2017). Reading and writing about literature (4th ed). Macmillan Learning.

Purdue Online Writing Lab. (n.d.). Paraphrase: Write in your own words. Paraphrasing - Purdue OWL® - Purdue University

Spatt, B. (1999). Writing from sources (5th ed.). St. Martin’s Press. University of Wisconsin-Madison. (2020). The writer’s handbook. UW-Madison Writer’s Handbook – The Writing Center – UW–Madison (wisc.edu)

University of Reading. (n.d.). Techniques for paraphrasing. Techniques for paraphrasing (futurelearn.com)

University of Wisconsin-Madison. (2020). UW-Madison writer’s handbook. Techniques for paraphrasing (futurelearn.com)